Jo Grishman - Artist

Generosity

2012-01-26T09:43:00.000-08:00

Yesterday after my chiropractic visit to try to get this back problem resolved, I went for a walk as recommended by my doctor. It was the first non-rainy day so I headed to walk in the Pearl. I passed Antiques and Oddities at 1605 NW Everett St. and peered into the window. There I spotted a few antique tea pots and cups. Just what I have been looking for, to complete my pair of chairs for the Chair Affair (once I am able to work on them again and feeling frustrated as we are getting down to the wire on finishing them). By the way, I am not someone who works well under pressure or leaves things for the last minute. That is way out of my comfort zone, and with feeling like there is no light at the end of this back pain tunnel, I am forced to allow this to be right now. I have no other choice. I went into the store to browse and keep my sanity a bit and found just the little set I have been looking for. Right style, right colors, higher price than I wanted to pay. The thrift stores have not come even close to having any prospects for pots that would be an asset to my chairs. The owner, Steve Wolford, saw me looking and asked if he could be of some help. I got onto my Chair Affair/Community Warehouse soap box and poured out my heartfelt passion for both. After a lovely and lengthy conversation, Steve said, " you are so passionate about this so how about $10" and I responded "that's practically free!" and took him up on his offer. Wow, all you have to do is put it out there, and you never know what you are going to get! He also said that he always has lots of chairs in is warehouse that are a bit beat up, needing some lovin, and that he would be happy to offer to next years event too. Well my back still hurts, but my spirit is filled with the generosity of spirit that shows up at the most unexpected times. If you are ever in the neighborhood, please check out his amazing shop of wonderful finds and support a local business owner that knows the meaning of giving.

The New and Improved Website

2012-01-24T09:58:00.000-08:00

After much tweaking by my trusty web designer (the amazing Jenni) I am very happy with the outcome of my new website. Please check it out. I am still completing it but it is up and running and I am very excited about it!

http://jogrishmanartist.weebly.com

Working on My Chairs, Another Blip In The Road

2012-01-20T17:57:00.000-08:00

As I savored working on my pair of chairs for the Chair Affair last weekend at the lake, my back went out on me, so for now, the hopes of getting them done early is a mere dream. I still believe they will be done on time, since we actually have until Feb 10 to hand them in. The frustration, however, remains and I have to just be with it, as I am laid up on my back. I do hope to be up to attending the first meeting of our newly forming (yet to be named) new Portland Artist Collective spin off tomorrow afternoon at The Lucky Lab in Multnomah Village at 3 pm. I am really looking forward to meeting a group of like minded creative spirits who want to create a sense of artist community. I am very excited about the possibilities. For now, I rest............ Here are a few before and progress pix of my set of chairs that will be named "The Tao of Tete a Tea".

My New Website Launched

2012-01-20T17:27:00.000-08:00

Just a note to announce a new website that I have created that will allow viewers to learn a bit more about my work as a mixed media sculptor and see a slideshow of my current bodies of work. It is a work in progress so enjoy! Please visit me at:

http://jogrishmanartist.weebly.com

The 6th Annual Chair Affair is Beginning to Come Alive!

2011-12-13T16:17:00.000-08:00

http://www.communitywarehouse.org/chairaffair

Still Waiting..........

2011-12-09T12:50:00.000-08:00

After a endlessly long time "waiting" to do the final firing of the remaining chairs for my "Waiting" installation, and finally wanting, needing to be ready to move on to my next body of work, there was more unexpected waiting. I delicately, lovingly loaded the last family of chairs into my kiln in my basement studio. When I sat down on the floor to program the kiln, I noticed that under my shelf, where all the chairs were drying, along with those already fired chairs, was a lone broken chair. It had somehow been knocked to the floor, probably by one of the interlopers that unfortunately sometimes pass through our basement. I looked sadly at it feeling, oh no, not another setback. I am feeling this need to move on in so many areas of my life right now, but constantly feel pulled back by life itself happening. My choices were, change the number of chairs , from my original intent of the auspicious 108

BUDDHIST

Followers use 108 beads in their malas. They implement the following formula:

6 x 3 x 2 x3 = 108 6 senses [sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, thought] 3 aspects of time [past, present, future] 2 condition of heart [pure or impure] 3 possibilities of sentiment [like, dislike, indifference]

The meaning of the number 108 has been a resonant voice for me that I did not want to stray from. It did not feel true to myself to change it, even after all the "waiting" for the piece to become. I was feeling impatient but a need to be true to my self. I did not want to take the easy way out. My other choice, was to create another chair, after the fact, so to speak, after it felt finished, to be a substitute for the broken one, but I felt that the integrity of the piece, for me would be compromised.No one else would notice the change, but I would, and I have put too much into this piece to compromise now. Each chair was created in a specific order, with a specific intention and story behind it, representing what was happening in my life at the time. My decision was to pick up the crumbled, broken chair and try to mend it, not an easy task. Two of the legs where broken off. Ironically, this is how I am feeling at the moment, broken, trying hard to stand and support myself emotionally, and trying to mend my heart, again not an easy task. So this is what I was compelled to do. The chair that broke was ironically entitled Disappointment, from when the Waiting installation was not accepted into the Portland Building last year for their exhibit. So here I was, faced with this wounded little chair, like Humpty Dumpty. I used all the tricks of the trade, vinegar, slip, toilet paper shreds , time and patience. It is now, after a few hours of tedious work, back together again, not the same as it was before. Now it is awkward, unbalanced, misshaped, unable to stand on it's own, and not pleasant looking like the other chairs in the family of Waiting, although they are each a bit unique, and have their own personalities. It looks a bit out of place, and there is no guarantee it will survive the firing. More waiting. I will sequester the chair on it's own shelf for the firing, so that if it shatters, it will not harm the other chairs. I scratched off the title from the back, breaking it a bit again, mending it again, and then carving it's new name on the back, difficult with bone dry clay. It is now named Loss and will now be moved, taking the auspicious spot of last chair, the final one to be finished in the installation of 108. It will hold a small feather that a bird lost, and that I picked up and saved in Florida, during a rare, brief walk to gather myself, and try to take care of myself. Sometimes, things get broken, and they will never be the same again. Sometimes they can be mended, and will still never be the same either. Part of life, part of hurt, part of being human, part of death. Whether it is relationships that are not what you once thought they were, that you thought you could count on and now you feel deceived, or the people you love break and you have to let go of what they were, and accept what they are, or are not, right now. We have to try to give up all hope of a better past, and try to accept and make peace with what is now. Change is inevitable, suffering is optional, so they say. Neither feels easy right now, but it just is. In a few days, when the broken and mended chair is dry enough to join the others in the kiln I will fire it. I have to give up any expectation that it will not break again, will not survive the firing. I will have to wait and see and know that I have no control over the outcome, but trust that the outcome will be as it should be.

Please Vote to Support the Community Warehouse! (You don't even have to leave your house!!)

2011-12-03T09:48:00.000-08:00

THE IDEA

Every year thousands of tons of usable furniture and household items are dumped in area landfills by people who don't know what to do with an unwanted mattress, couch, or television. Don't Dump It, Donate It! is a campaign to collect reusable items and redistribute them to families in need.http://www.communitywarehouse.org

THE PLAN

Community Warehouse collects and redistributes donated household items and furniture to individuals and families working to rebuild their lives. As the only furniture bank in our area, we help those who are resettling after crises such as homelessness. Funds will be used to increase our collection capacity, addressing our shortage of frequently requested items while keeping usable items out of the landfill. This project involves community education and outreach, collection and landfill diversion, and direct human service through redistribution. The gently used goods will provide low-income families with the ability to cook whole meals, eat together at a kitchen table, and enough blankets, towels, and sheets along with beds to sleep on.

PLEASE VOTE HERE TO HELP MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

One Foot In Front of The Other

2011-12-03T08:47:00.001-08:00

"In the darkest hour the soul is replenished and given strength to continue and endure."

H.W. Chosa

As difficult as it might be, I am trying to move forward, sometimes not sure if I have what it takes to propel me forward, yet I try. My art gives me solace and when I got a call from Pammela at Cannibals, it was just the nudge I needed to get myself out there, by putting my art out there. My art is an extension of my soul, my spiritual practice, my self portrait, and the opportunity to let go of some of my creations and put them into the world, somehow creates space to create new work, in response to my life right now. Whether it is in response to the beauty of the colors of Sedona and The Grand Canyon, or the darkness that I feel inside, that loss brings. So I have 6 of my smaller mixed media sculptures on exhibit at Cannibals. They are part of the holiday offering, to allow people to considering one of a kind locally created artwork. The sense of art community that Cannibals offers, is one sense of place that will keep me moving forward now, one foot in front of the other.

"In release, we begin." ~ From The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo

How To Step Back Into The Dance of Life

2011-11-30T10:59:00.000-08:00

Last night I had to push my weary body to take that first step back into the dance of life, by returning to dance. It was not easy and it was exhausting. How strange the struggle is, of going forward with life as usual, when life is anything but usual. How to allow myself to attempt to experience joy, without guilt. How dare I, but how dare I not. It felt like the moving walkway in the airport, that you try to find the perfect moment to step onto, without missing a step. To step back into my old life with the people and commitments and find that opening, because yes, things are not the same as usual. Yet those places of solace, those comforting richnesses are still there, I just have to step into them, to find that opening. How strange to enter the dance space and see the poem that was strewn on the floor, the same poem we were dancing when I left three weeks ago, a lifetime ago. There was a comfort in that sameness. Like in the Wizard of Oz when Dorothy awakens from her "dream" to find all is still the same, waiting for her as if she had never left. It felt that time had somehow stood still, and that the dance had waited for me. In reality, it is the longest Mary Oliver Poem we have danced to date, so I was soothed to see that I was there the first day we started dancing it, and would be present to continue the poem until we were done. The line that chose me last night, did not particularly speak to me, from Have You Ever Tried to Enter the Long Black Branches? My line was, "And I would touch the faces of the daises," but when Winky commented that maybe it meant to be gentle with myself, I felt touched, moved, held, loved. The line my fellow dancer chose spoke to me in a more immediate direct way, the way that I have been feeling " but suffer my devotion." so I know I danced that line too. This is what it feels like right now. How devotion always seems to bring suffering of some kind. The devotion does not feel like a choice, but is the suffering inevitable? I am trying to figure this one out, to dance it out in my life right now with baby steps, the only dance steps I can take at this moment. And the last line of the poem is, "I climb, I backtrack. I float. I ramble my way home."

The Persistence of Memory

2011-11-18T12:56:00.000-08:00

There is no one way to let go, to hold on, to give up hope of a better past, and to live in this moment, as painful as it may be, as you let a loved one go. I can't stop being drawn to listen to the song The Persistence of Memory, over and over again. It is so ironic, because it brings me back to a time and place when I was in elementary school, starring as the scarecrow in the school production of The Wizard of Oz, a book that has become my personal bible. I remember going to my teacher Mrs. Snyder's house for a cast party, and as everyone mingled, the painfully shy me, sat on the couch devouring what would be the first art book that would start my obsessively wonderful art book collection. When I returned home like an excited school girl, and told my parents, my next surprise present was none other than my very own copy of the Salvador Dali that I still have today. This book, the luscious gold covered Salvador Dali book, with the melting clocks of his painting The Persistence of Memory on the cover, is still one of my all time cherished books. I became enthralled with surrealism in art and still am, and the way I am feeling right now is surreal. I am sleep deprived and my soul is aching. My legs feel as liquid as the melting clocks, and they feel as they can not support me most of the time. I feel the need for the crutches that are omnipresent in Dali's paintings. I am trying to hold my family and myself up with a liquid body, and hold my mother up as well, because her legs are truly failing, her as she transitions out of the world as she has known it. I am so angry that I keep being presented with lessons on how to learn to live "the new normal". How many shifts in the world as one knows it, can be made, and still feel some sort of stability, rootedness, sense of place? I feel as if as soon as I learn how to navigate a road, the road changes. They have been tarring and paving and rerouting people in this Florida community in which my mother lives for the two weeks (or has it been two months that I have been here?) and nothing seems to go smoothly. Time seems to both stand still, and be endless at the same time. Is it unrealistic to think that life should go smoothly? Apparently so! I finished my 2 mile walk, in the first rain and breeze of this oppressively hot and humid Florida. It has felt suffocating, but not as suffocating as my mother must be enduring, so how can I complain. I can finally open the windows and let a bit of the outside in, but it still feels so claustrophobic. I feel like I am drowning and trying to reach and grab onto a lifeline that I can barely see through the fog, yet I continue to reach, to dig deeply, to find the strength to move through this, knowing there is a light at the end of the tunnel, although it seems so dark and elusive in this moment. I have to have faith that light does exist and that "this too shall pass" (one of my father's favorite sayings). Although right now, I find it difficult to feel thankful or grateful, although this year has given me so much to feel grateful for, this Thanksgiving, the greatest gift would be a peaceful dignified passing for my mother. As I completed my walk, the last song to shuffle to my ears was India Arie singing the lyrics "strength, courage and wisdom are inside of me". Have to make that my mantra and hold onto that truth and believe. And then the memories will persist, good, bad and everything in between. I think that must be what we call life...........

The Persistence of Memory

When I’m traveling far from home

On the wide horizon

I can feel you’re still around

And the dream overtakes me

Then I know, you’ll stay in this moment

We’ll go where it’s flowing

You’ll be what you want to be right here, with me

When I’m out here on my own

And it all cuts through me

I see you’re safe alone

Ah, then it hits me

And I know, you’re here in this moment

Right where it’s flowing

You are what you want to be

Right here, with me

Stay in this moment

Go where it’s flowing

You are what you want to be

Right here, with me . . . with me . . . with me. . .

Dancing and Falling Into The Longest Poem as the Days Grow Darker

2011-11-02T11:30:00.000-07:00

Now that it is truly feeling like the crisp autumn is upon us,

a time of feeling a pull inward to the darkness, that, however difficult,

I feel I must resist against for the moment,

I danced last night for the last time for a few weeks,

as I begin my journey to Florida, to share some richness of family.

I take this poem with me,

to inspire, to inquire, to explore, to sort it out, to understand,

to dance the poem in my life, as I did last night to the shortest line,

I float.

This poem could not be more perfect for me to delve into,

and move through into the darkness the end of the year brings.

It offers such richness and depth. Ironic, that this line, I float,

chose me last night, since I have not been feeling grounded lately,

yet not feeling the lightness of being that the vision of floating

brings into my mind either. Instead, I need to be grounded, rooted,

yet I will be flying once again, traveling that does not come easily to me.

How does one float and stay grounded simultaneously?

It seems like an oxymoron.

I feel like my arms are the wings that are being used to fly,

although weighted down with emotions of many sorts,

making it difficult for my arms, my wings, to lift in flight.

They are heavy with burden, yet I try to lift them anyways,

and float, glide, if I can. Trying to gain the momentum I need,

to propel myself forward into the darkness,

and carry my family with me. But for now,

I will try to enter the long black branches, to try to become rooted,

grounded, and savor every word, every line my fellow dancers

began to dance last night with me, and I will continue to dance

into the growing darkness, as the longer darkening days of autumn

slip silently upon us. I will take them all in on my travels,

and dance them, however my life shows up at the moment.

I will try to gain wisdom and strength from these words,

as I carry my family on my wings and still try to reach that

lightness of being and be able to soar, and in the words of Mary Oliver

.............determined to do the only thing you could do

--determined to save the only life you could save.....

Have You Ever Tried to Enter the Long Black Branches?

~ Mary Oliver~

"Have you ever tried to enter the long black branches of other lives --
tried to imagine what the crisp fringes, full of honey, hanging
from the branches of the young locust trees, in early morning, feel like?

Do you think this world was only an entertainment for you?

Never to enter the sea and notice how the water divides
with perfect courtesy, to let you in!
Never to lie down on the grass, as though you were the grass!
Never to leap to the air as you open your wings over the dark acorn of your heart!

No wonder we hear, in your mournful voice, the complaint
that something is missing from your life!

Who can open the door who does not reach for the latch?
Who can travel the miles who does not put one foot
in front of the other, all attentive to what presents itself
continually?
Who will behold the inner chamber who has not observed
with admiration, even with rapture, the outer stone?

Well, there is time left --
fields everywhere invite you into them.

And who will care, who will chide you if you wander away
from wherever you are, to look for your soul?

Quickly, then, get up, put on your coat, leave your desk!

To put one's foot into the door of the grass, which is
the mystery, which is death as well as life, and
not be afraid!

To set one's foot in the door of death, and be overcome
with amazement!

To sit down in front of the weeds, and imagine
god the ten-fingered, sailing out of his house of straw,
nodding this way and that way, to the flowers of the
present hour,
to the song falling out of the mockingbird's pink mouth,
to the tippets of the honeysuckle, that have opened

in the night

To sit down, like a weed among weeds, and rustle in the wind!

Listen, are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life?

While the soul, after all, is only a window,

and the opening of the window no more difficult
than the wakening from a little sleep.

Only last week I went out among the thorns and said
to the wild roses:
deny me not,
but suffer my devotion.
Then, all afternoon, I sat among them. Maybe

I even heard a curl or tow of music, damp and rouge red,
hurrying from their stubby buds, from their delicate watery bodies.

For how long will you continue to listen to those dark shouters,
caution and prudence?
Fall in! Fall in!

A woman standing in the weeds.
A small boat flounders in the deep waves, and what's coming next
is coming with its own heave and grace.

Meanwhile, once in a while, I have chanced, among the quick things,
upon the immutable.
What more could one ask?

And I would touch the faces of the daises,
and I would bow down
to think about it.

That was then, which hasn't ended yet.

Now the sun begins to swing down. Under the peach-light,
I cross the fields and the dunes, I follow the ocean's edge.

I climb, I backtrack.
I float.
I ramble my way home."

Trying to Absorb Our Wonderful Grand Canyon/Sedona Voyage

2011-11-02T11:22:00.000-07:00

I have arrived, I can't believe I am here and I am in shock!!!!

I have not fully absorbed and given myself time to embrace my trip to Arizona, since I will be on the road again shortly. I think I have not written about the trip because it is something that words cannot describe. The almost 700 pictures I took , do not even come close to capturing the awesomeness of Mother Nature and the humbling smallness that I felt. Smallness in a wonderful way, as I felt held by all I saw. There were many highlights as I explored the land hiking the Red Rocks of Sedona,
or seeing the sun set from the balcony of our hotel,
venturing down hiking into The Grand Canyon,

(well the word Grand simply doesn't do it justice!)

from the air, on the Colorado River

hiking into Antelope Canyon, accompanied by our Navajo guide playing his flute, a truly spiritual moment for us both,

watching the elk frolic outside the lodge,

being gifted with a rainbow over the Grand Canyon!,

To say the least, it was the trip of a lifetime, and I feel forever changed for having experienced it and especially for sharing it with my beloved!

and see the world through his eyes!

.....was willing to be afraid

2011-10-20T16:57:00.000-07:00

As we continue to dance Mary Oliver's Starfish, I continue to explore the depths to which her words take me. Tonight, my line was, ...."was willing to be afraid". I was immediately struck by the knowing feeling, that I operate from a fear based center, radiating outward, yet once again acknowledging the resistance that energetically comes from this way of dancing my life. I am constantly aware of the struggle against my nemisis, fear. My thoughts, as I entered the dance, were, what would it look like if I was willing to be afraid, and surrender to that feeling, without the dissecting and trying to figure it out and understand it, without the resistance that comes with fighting fear? What if I could accept that fear is often an inevitable emotion, but that it does not have to be the driving force? What if fear is just fear, and not a monster to attempt to slay? What would it feel like to melt into the emotion of fear and practice acceptance rather than anger and frustration? What would it feel like to not fear, fear? A strange conundrum. These are all concepts that feel so foreign to my way of doing life, that I don't know what that might feel like. What if the fighting of fear, only fuels its momentum and creates more fear, that creates a dizzying, out of control, spiral dance? I entered the dance, and found myself clutching the raw brick wall in the dark, back of the dance studio. I was moved to reach upward, in an attempt to move forward into and through it, futilely of course. I could feel myself struggling against the rough, uneven wall, reaching with a strangely irrational feeling of hopefulness, although I knew I could never move up or through the wall, yet I kept trying. I began to dance, as though I did not have to accept the futile struggle against the wall, but could dance with the wall, as if it were another living entity in the room. My dance continued to evolve, as I moved and rolled along the wall, and reached until I felt taller and stronger. The texture beneath my fingers became somewhat soothing and familiar with time. What if I could continue to reach up and forward, without the expectation of moving through the inevitably impassable brick wall? What if I just moved along it, feeling it's roughness on my hands, my arms, on my body, through my clothes, without allowing it to irritate me, without the need to pass through it? Without needing and wanting it to be different? What if feeling the roughness, the impenetrable walls that seem to sometimes be at my every turn, are just part of this dance, and that it is essential to my survival to learn to move along it, only reaching as far up as I can, knowing it will sometimes be uncomfortable, and that its roughness will scratch, even hurt my body? What if I can begin accepting that I cannot reach through it, no matter how hard I try? Do I stop trying?
What if I "was willing to be afraid"? What if ????????

Yes It Poured!

2011-10-12T16:13:00.000-07:00

Last night, as I made my way to dance, through deep standing water and a sudden, unbelievable downpour, I made my way east, over the river, over the Steel Bridge, to find that half of the sky was shining brightly. I knew intuitively, at that moment, just where to look for my rainbow, that I knew was waiting for me. It was one of the most brilliant rainbows I have ever seen, and alongside it was a fainter 1/3 rainbow! How could the evening get any better? Well, as always, it does, when I enter the dance studio, a sacred space with dim lights, a candle lit altar, a place where I go to fill and be filled. I have been feeling so harried as if I am drowning lately, even before the rain began, and Tuesday night dance is the place I go to dance my life. We drew our lines from the floor and the one wavy slip of paper called to me, since it looked as water logged as I felt. My line could not have been more perfect, unless I had chosen the line my fellow dancer chose. Hers was, but at last I grew peaceful. At first I had "line envy", I wanted that, but then I realized, that even though I had not chosen that line, I could still "have it". Mine for the taking, if I only reach out. My line was, poured its harsh song through the sluices. This Mary Oliver poem, was one that I was not familiar with. My first thoughts were literal, not usually the way I think, about arriving to dance through the pouring rain and through the rainbow. I was not familiar with the word sluice, so we began to discuss it's meaning. It is a place of strength, power, rushing and pressure of the water as it squeezes it's way through the resistance, often between the small space that is created by closely spaced rocks. Is this not how I have been feeling? Yet, seeing that the power and strength that can grow from meeting the resistance and pushing through the tight spaces, is difficult, but necessary and freeing. Once the water makes it's way through this tight space, there is room to expand, slow down, spread out, allow and simply be. There can become a clarity, as the grains of sand settle out of the once turbulent water. What a lesson, as always, yet always a surprise, what I learn when I dance and allow it to flow through me. To not resist, not question or sensor my movement and feelings. As I moved through the room, through and amongst my fellow dancers, with a quickened pace and a swirling twirling feeling and movement, I paused occasionally to engage with another's movement. I often stay in a self imposed smaller dance space, but I felt pulled by the tide last night. We had spoken about the intention of seeing our room as a tide pool of sorts, a world unto itself. It felt that way, as each dancer moved in their own space yet totally aware of each others presence and importance, in this microcosm we create, in this sacred dance space. After a while, the music began to slow down after the animalistic, jungle, tribal feeling it had crescendoed into. I was finally able to settle in. At last I grew peaceful, within and without.

Starfish

In the sea rocks,

in the stone pockets

under the tide’s lip,

in water dense as blindness

they slid

like sponges,

like too many thumbs.

I knew this, and what I wanted

was to draw my hands back

from the water – what I wanted

was to be willing

to be afraid.

But I stayed there,

I crouched on the stone wall

while the sea poured its harsh song

through the sluices,

while I waited for the gritty lightning

of their touch, while I stared

down through the tide’s leaving

where sometimes I could see them –

their stubborn flesh

lounging on my knuckles.

What good does it do

to lie all day in the sun

loving what is easy?

It never grew easy,

but at last I grew peaceful:

all summer

my fear diminished

as they bloomed through the water

like flowers, like flecks

of an uncertain dream,

while I lay on the rocks, reaching

into the darkness, learning

little by little to love

our only world.

~ Mary Oliver ~

Featured work on Cannibals website

2011-10-02T16:22:00.000-07:00

Check out the Cannibals Gallery Day of the Dead exhibit on their website featuring my watercolor painting! Better yet, come to the gallery and enjoy the exhibit. By the way if you walk past Cannibals on NW 21st my assemblage piece is in the left window!! I'm delighted!

Waiting............... the completion of the 108th chair!

2011-10-02T16:04:00.000-07:00

Yes Waiting............in every sense of the word. I am filled with so many emotions right now that I was not anticipating, as I completed sculpting the last of the 108 ceramic chairs that comprise the installation piece Waiting aptly as I await turning 58 years old in a few days. Completing them feels like a landmark to me in many ways. Sometimes, it felt as though I would never finish it. I have ridden the roller coaster of life during this span of time that I was waiting and working and experiencing the creation of this piece, as it paralleled my life. I began sculpting the first few chairs left handed as I awaited the third surgery to repair the torn cartilage in my right wrist. I continued to create chairs in waves and spurts of energy and momentum, many times being side tracked by things happening in life, as things often do. Sometimes I felt as though I was derailed. I used the chairs as outlets of sorts, a voice for some of the things I was going through. Each chair, and sometimes groups of chairs, have names on the back, commemorating what was happening at the time, both trying times and times of joy. It feels satisfying, cathartic, sad, empty, proud, grateful and some other emotions that I can't quite put names to yet. I suppose I was more involved in the piece than I even realized, although I felt very connected to it every moment of the way. Often a love/hate relationship of, "how many do I have left", "isn't it over yet", "I don't want it to end", "what comes next" , and "wow I can't believe I stayed with it and actually did not abandon it when it felt like I wanted to give up". Sometimes it felt tedious and sometimes it felt like solace. There were times that I questioned myself about why I felt compelled to created Waiting. I felt self doubt about whether or not I could actually follow through with it and not just give up. I am proud of the discipline I had to see it through to the end. I still have to fire them and find a place to exhibit them, but as I put the last finishing finger stroke on the last of the 108 chairs, I felt like crying. Dumb huh? But that is how I felt. Butterflies in my stomach and a bit shaky, or was it too little sleep last night as my mind raced at full speed or too much coffee? Or am I just feeling the completion of a piece that I set out to do, to birth, not really knowing where it was going. I am still feeling a rush of emotions. Just having finished it feels like almost enough, although I know that once I fire them and collect all the found objects that I have been gathering all this time, which will each find their proper place on the throne of each chair created especially for it, things that I have collected that have marked my time, it will feel even more complete and satisfying. When I install it, in its to be decided gallery home, once I find one, and see it in its entirety, I know I will once again feel weak in the knees from pride and emotion. How was I to ever anticipate the feelings that creating and finally finishing this work would gift me? I finished the last three chairs today in my studio by the lake, and now I sit here writing as I look at the still reflection of the trees in the water, with the air filled with the chill of autumn and cacophony of birds echoing through the quiet. I feel so small as I sit in the shadow of the large Washington evergreens, yet so full inside, despite my shakiness. I suppose I did not believe in myself enough to think that I would follow through with Waiting. I suppose that is what waiting is partly about. Not knowing what to expect, not knowing what comes next, not always understanding what and why things are happening now, or why things have happened in the past, but knowing that this is all part of the ride. I will pack these last chairs carefully and lovingly like cherished china dolls, as they make their ride back to the kiln in Portland, to enter into their next incarnation. Someone last week was telling me about salmon, and how they signify the life cycle and returning home at the end of their journey. The last three chairs are entitled, Returning, Upstream, and lastly, Home. I pick up a dark soft feather that just fell from a bird that has passed overhead. I suppose the birds are gradually beginning their journey south as the winter will be soon approaching. I am sitting with my fleece hoodie on the dock feeling it too. Beginning to feel the call inward. The water looks like glass, yet the things reflected in it seem distorted anyway, yet I recognize them. I look for clarity. I continue on, not knowing what the next piece of clay will become or reveal, or what the future holds for me, as I continue to return upstream home, to myself. Once again, I hear the words of Mary Oliver pulse through my mind. They seem to have taken up permanent residence in there and I am happy for that. I hear the words of Journey, which seems so appropriate to me today, so I visit it once again. Each time I read it with anticipation, as if I am hearing the words for the first time, although I know them like old friends. I never tire of them. I welcome them, as they create a place of comfort for me, as sense of coming home to myself.

The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice --
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do --
determined to save
the only life you could save.

~ Mary Oliver ~

return of the wild geese

2011-09-30T12:18:00.000-07:00

After the disappointment of missing the Catch The Light retreat in the Gorge, I had to try to come back to the dance, healing back and all, and learn to listen to my body, dance gently and begin to move again. The movement comes from within and without and is vital to my existence. Inquiry seemed like the perfect class to attend since it is more gentle and combines my love of movement and writing. Winky so beautifully said that dance is the sign language of the divine, and that truly spoke to a place deep within my soul. Before we started I told Winky that I wondered which Mary Oliver poem is our dance inspiration this week and she asked me to guess. Without hesitation I said I think we are revisiting Wild Geese. We were both flabbergasted. I could feel the pull of the poem. It is truly probably one of my top two favorite poems by Mary Oliver, the second being The Journey. We sat for about a half hour and wrote in response to our line, mine being perfect, as always, "in the family of things" but when we went around the circle, I couldn't help but have the other's lines weave their way into my story, my dance. The more I wrote, the more the words created openings of understanding for me. In "the family of things" "you don't have to be good" and "you don't have to be lonely", you can be yourself, and fly high like the wild geese. You can be free to be yourself. "In the family of things" you make sacrifices, but you don't have to give yourself away. How does one let go of expectations, to be comfortable with ones self, and resist the need to fix things "in the family of things"? How do we learn to let go of the resistance? The place in the family is not of "things", it is a deeper place of being, that transcends all other relationships. It is the place you go, to go home. That place of home is also the self, in this body, at this moment in time. That home is always waiting for you. It is safe.
The next night I danced the line "you only have to let the soft animal of your body" and that brought me thoughts of quieting with the equinox, the yin time of the year where you want to nuzzle into yourself, to enter into the cocoon and rest, and begin to learn to practice self-care. You can care for others and not have to sacrifice self-care. It is a constant learning. In this family of things, in this body, I will soar and as Mary Oliver so beautifully stated, "love what it loves", the family and the self.

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your bodylove what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

~ Mary Oliver ~

Splendorporium

2011-09-30T11:32:00.000-07:00

I am delighted to be a part of the Splendorporium exhibit Pets & Portraits. I have two sculptures that will be on exhibit from October 7 through the 30th. The First Friday opening reception is from 7-9pm with music by The Sam Adams Project. The gallery hours are weekdays 11 am-5 pm at 3421 SE 21st Ave. It is an especially fun and funky place to exhibit, and what makes it truly special, is that it is a gallery space shared with The Art4Life Children's Gallery. This is a non-profit art and cultural enrichment program that Jenni has just begun her newest venture with, teaching at two Portland schools before and after school. How wonderful it will be to have my work along side the present creative minds/future artists. How essential it is to provide the enriching outlet of art as a vital means of self expression. I am grateful to Jenni and The Museum of Contemporary Craft's Gaby for encouraging me to begin to be a part of Splendorpoium. Stay tuned for upcoming exhibits as well. Swing by and you will be certainly amazed at the uninhibited zestful work of artist young and old!

Cannibals

2011-09-23T09:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I dropped off two pieces at Cannibals Gallery for their Dia de los Muertos exhibit. I am delighted that they will be featuring my painting "Till Death Do Us Part" (below) on their website for the exhibit next month. I am also now on their list of artists so check out their website and my artist link at the bottom. It is filled with exciting, innovative and unusual artwork by some really creative artists. I am honored to be amongst them! It feels good to be getting out there again. I look forward to hopefully exhibiting many more pieces there in the future. Check out their website and better yet, come into the gallery to experience the entire environment of mostly three dimensional work, which really needs to be seen in person to be able to be appreciated. It's like stepping into another world when you enter the gallery. The above piece is entitled "The Stage". Hope you can stop by and see it at Cannibals Gallery at 518 NW 21st Avenue. Enjoy!

A Disappointing Setback

2011-09-20T12:10:00.000-07:00

Saturday, Sep. 17

Real life isn't always going to be perfect or go our way, but the recurring acknowledgement of what is working in our lives can help us not only to survive but surmount our difficulties.

Sara Ban Breathnach

Well, there was no choice but to listen to my body, although I longed for it to be different. Longing doesn't change the reality of the situation though. I threw my back out at dance last Tuesday night and the following days of pain and spasm told me that I would not be able to attend the Catch the Light dance retreat in The Gorge this past weekend with my dance community. I have been so heartbroken about missing yet another event I was counting on, and so tired of feeling betrayed by my body once again. I keep trying to "figure out" what I did that hurt my back, but the fact remains that camping out or sleeping in my car, and then an evening and morning of dancing in the meadow, was not going to be in my best interest, no matter how much I wished the pain away. I try to remain grateful, knowing this is a temporary setback, something small in the big scheme of things, yet giving myself permission to feel disappointed. I am not being left out of the event, I am just learning to choose to take care of my body, myself, in any way that is necessary at this time. I longed to be amongst the other small group of dancers sharing community and dancing like moving sculptures in prayer to Mother Nature and moving in the meadow overlooking The Gorge, in the morning mist and chilly drizzle, as if they were rooted and growing from the land, a part of the moving ever changing landscape. But I know that The Gorge will be there next year, and I can dance there again, for the first time. I was there in spirit this time. The Gorge will be different, as will the dancers, as will I. It is a moment to moment dance in this life we are moving through. Sometimes the most important thing you can do is bear witness to the movement, the stillness, the change, no matter how much you want to be an active part of it. There is always so much to witness day to day, moment to moment, but in our hurried, harried days, we miss so much. Now, not by the choice I desired, I witness Catch The Light from afar and trust that some of that Light was emitted and dispersed from the lovely dancers in The Gorge, and a bit of it trickled down on me in Portland. That I too am a part of that dance just in the awareness, the witnessing, the being, from afar. Next time, I hope I will be able to touch it a bit closer. I can only hope, but for now, it is what it is, and I hope to move later this week, consciously and carefully at Inquiry. For now, I will try to take it moment by moment, and day to day. I think that now, as I see the almost autumn trees that are beginning to turn outside my window, glistening in the early afternoon sunlight, that I will take a walk. Today, that is the best dance that I can do, and I accept, that this is enough.

But Still I Stand Under The Trees

2011-08-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

As I sit by the lake listening to to rooster's call to morning echoing in the distance, I contemplate the richness of Tuesday's dance. It could not have been a more perfect poem or line that chose me this week. I had just put out my hummingbird feeder, at the beckoning of the hummingbird who visited me last week. I have not seen her yet this weekend. I hope that she has not given up on me! The words of Mary Oliver resonated on two levels for me. At first, I thought of all the fulfilling work I accomplished last weekend, under Mother Nature's awning of trees. I sanded and painted the old bench overlooking the lake a new and vibrant deep green, to provide a place for me to BE under her arms. The work for now is done, until I move on to the next project, but as I still stand under the trees, can I stand STILL? Therein lies the lesson, the practice that I embark upon. How do I learn to still stand under the trees and remain still with the silence, with the non-doing? How easy the doing is for me, the finding sense of purpose in the projects, the accomplishments, that I can stand back and admire and feel, yes, I did this. Defining myself by all that I have DONE rather than all that I can BE, by standing still under the trees in the moment. To be able to touch the silence, that quiet place that I know lies deep within me, waiting to be unleashed. Then the being can begin. The trees are not going anywhere. They are still, they are being, they exist and have their purpose and importance by remaining rooted, by bending and swaying with the wind, reflecting their grandness in the lake as the breeze ripples and distorts their shape, yet they remain unchanged. They surrender, and it cannot be any other way. I look out and up at their arms, at the shade their canopy creates. I feel protected and held. A seagull flies by, swooping and skimming the glass-like surface of the lake, looking for breakfast. The crows and other birds sing and echo in the morning, as the fog burns off. There is more clarity now as the sun awakens and makes it's presence known, burning through the morning clouds. Time for me to begin the day. How will I be today? Will I be able to learn to be? Baby steps once again, back at the beginning to start anew. To still stand under the trees and stand still under the trees. I welcome the sun as it yawns and does it's job of burning through the blanket of morning fog that hovers over the lake. I want to bask in it today. Just that and no more. We will see. Yes, permission for baby steps and room for a bit of doing, but creating more room today to allow the being to begin......

The Hummingbird

~~ Mary Oliver~~

"It’s morning, and again I am that lucky person who is in it.

And again it is spring,
and there are the apple trees,
and the hummingbird in its branches.
On the green wheel of his wings
he hurries from blossom to blossom,
which is his work, that he might live.

He is a gatherer of the fine honey of promise,
and truly I go in envy
of the ruby fire at his throat,
and his accurate, quick tongue,
and his single-mindedness.

Meanwhile the knives of ambition are stirring
down there in the darkness behind my eyes,
and I should go inside now to my desk and my pages.
But still I stand under the trees, happy and desolate,
wanting for myself such a satisfying coat
and brilliant work."

Don't Go Back to Sleep

2011-08-19T09:26:00.000-07:00

As I sit on the deck sipping my coffee, fleeced and hooded, I watch the morning mist hover over the lake, just as the steam rises from my cup. The crows sing loudly and it echos through the quiet. A hummingbird buzzes in my ear reminding me to fill and hang the new feeder I bought. I am reminded of one of Rumi's poems that I am so fond of. I approach the day.............

Don’t go back to sleep ~ Rumi~

"The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.

Don’t go back to sleep.

You must ask for what you really want.

Don’t go back to sleep.

People are going back and forth across the doorsill

where the two worlds touch.

The door is round and open.

Don’t go back to sleep."

Last Time I Danced Mary Oliver I Was Touched Once Again

2011-08-18T21:24:00.000-07:00

A River Far Away and Long Ago

The river

Of my childhood,

That tumbled

Down a passage of rocks

And cut-work ferns,

Came here and there

To the swirl

And slowdown

Of a pool

And I say myself-

Oh, clearly-

As I knelt at one-

Then I saw myself

As if carried away,

As the river moved on.

Where have I gone?

Since then

I have looked and looked

For myself,

Not sure

Who I am, or where,

Or, more importantly, why.

It’s okay-

I have had a wonderful life.

Still, I ponder

Where that other is-

Where I landed,

What I thought, what I did,

What small or even maybe meaningful deeds

I might have accomplished

Somewhere

Among strangers,

Coming to them

As only a river can-

Touching every life it meets-

That endlessly kind, that enduring.

Finding Solitude

2011-08-18T21:20:00.000-07:00

I can hardly see the keyboard to type as the sun is setting over the lake. The lake is reflecting the orange and pink of the western sky. It is peaceful except for the occasional dog bark that echos across the lake and the water skier trying to squeeze in one more run before sunset. My camera is at my side, Amos Lee playing in the background as the wakes and the wind create a gentle splash on the dock. There are still a few boats taking their "evening constitutional" around the lake to see what is going on. Ah..... now the silence sets in as the sky darkens. The pine trees that the Evergreen State are known for, create an ominous silhouette in the night sky and are reflected in the rippling lake. Even the rippling is slowing and settling in for the night. I hear a few girls giggle echoing across the lake as well. The dark descends rapidly and the bats begin their evening swoop to gather their evening snack of insects. I am spent after a day of scrubbing, furniture refinishing and various chores that called to me. My body aches. I finally settled in with a glass of wine, some leftover barbecued meat and some simple tomato salad I put together, and finally attempted to STOP. To digest the day and savor the feeling of hard work and down time. The sun sets and rests. The water on the lake turns to glass and it rests. The crows that create the morning symphony rest now. It is now time for me to listen. To listen to nature, as it quiets and tucks in for the evening. I have a big day of projects on deck for tomorrow, if I can only settle in too, and sleep. The night is so quiet that every little evening sound and bump in the night is magnified. I am so used to the sounds of the city. The dumpster crashing, the rattling bottles in the shopping carts. Now it is time to become friends with the evening sounds of the lake. Is it a raccoon on the roof, a deer out for a snack in the garden, a hummingbird wondering if I have put out her new feeder yet? The house settling? It knows how to settle. I will try to listen to the lake, the house, the critters and the world settling in. Can I listen and learn as well? I am alone with my thoughts, the water, the breeze, the insects, the bats, the croaking toads, the swaying trees the quieting lake. How do I learn to settle in too as the day comes to an end and the darkness descends? Yet another lesson to learn from nature. The sun will rise in the morning and there will be a crispness in the air as I sip my coffee on the porch. The day begins, but the day must first be put to rest to gain strength to meet the new day. I have big plans that I would love to let unfold, but I must first rest. Or can I actually allow myself to rest tomorrow, to allow? The mosquitos are beckoning me inside. The sky is almost completely dark. The day is coming to an end and so must I put the doing and the thinking to rest. I long for the quiet rest that Mother Nature finds no difficulty reaching. It is mine for the taking. I just have to reach out as naturally as Mother Nature does. It is effortless and the only way she can thrive. All I have to do is watch, listen and allow. It is all I have to do. Why does the non-doing seem more difficult for me than the doing? Yet another lesson to learn, practice, the beginners mind has me back at the start once again. I long to learn the lesson, this time............maybe tonight..........maybe tomorrow............

Me and My Best Friend in Santa Fe!

2011-06-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

I am still settling back into home after an amazing four day trip to Santa Fe with my sweet daughter Jenni!

We had the time of our lives. When we first arrived in Albuquerque, Jenni pulled off the road to chase a tumbleweed for me. We laughed when after she finally tackled it and gave it a seat in our car, only to look up and see miles of fences filled with tumbleweed that had been trapped by the wind! We filled our days looking at art on Canyon Road and out and about Santa Fe, hiking up tall ladders into cave dwellings at Bandolier Park (and oh yeah my foot held up!), a brief and quite enlightening trip followed by stimulating conversation about The Sanctuario de Chimayo, experiencing fine, fine dining, margaritas (of course) and wine, probably too much guac and chips, great conversation and laughs, browsing and exploring local jewelry, crafts and woven rugs, talking to the artists, soaking our tired feet in the out door hot tub and making memories that I will cherish forever! She is one amazing woman and every moment with her is a fun ride!

Starting to think of MOM again already!?

2011-05-23T10:30:00.004-07:00

What's new in 2011 for MOM?

Thanks to the Oregon Convention Center's generosity in providing us with additional space,

we'll be able to bring the patients INSIDE to wait for treatment!

The clinic will still be first come, first served, but at 4am on Monday and Tuesday mornings, we’ll open the doors to the first 1,000 in line.

We will get them registered and have oral and other health education stations set up in the waiting area.

This also means that some of the departments will open earlier than they did last year as we’d like to have people in the dental chairs and dentists working at 6 am!

Keep an eye on the OrMOM website for more information on the 2011 clinic.

All are welcome to volunteer doing anything from registration, escorting, translating and as runners.

Remnants bags by Jo now for sale!

2011-05-17T10:02:00.000-07:00

Since a lot of business have gone out around town and left vacant spaces, the phenomenon of "pop-up" shop has been happening. One such shop is in the old historic Millennium Music space on the corner or NW 23 & Johnson. It has been taken over on a temporary basis by Friends of Multnomah County Library and a group of artists and craftspeople who are displaying, and selling their work with part of the proceeds going to our Multnomah County Library. I approached them and we found the perfect rack to display and sell my hand made purses called Remnants, since that is what they are made from! I am excited to "get them out there". I always enjoy sewing them but now they are looking for new homes. I need the space and the library needs new books! A perfect match wouldn't you say? Swing by and check out the pop-up store when you are out and about the neighborhood.

Luke Jensen's Lego-cy Carnival!!

2011-05-17T09:42:00.000-07:00

After having the honor or painting around Luke Jensen's words on Sunday, it seemed like fate that I should come home to an email calling me to volunteer to help out with the first annual Lego fund-raising event this Friday, May 20th, for Luke, one of the kids served through CHAP who passed away from cancer last year at age 9 (a lot of the messages in the new space were for Luke!) The event is in Vancouver, WA. It's a Lego Carnival! There will be approximately 500 people attending this event. I will be at the CHAP table helping the kids with hands-on crafts.

The practice of donating boxed Lego sets in Luke Jensen’s name will continue.

Luke, who had leukemia, died in May 2010 at age 9. Attendees at his memorial service brought boxed Lego sets to be donated to sick children.

“Luke’s Lego-cy Carnival” will be 5 to 9 p.m. May 20 at King’s Way Christian Schools, 3300 N.E. 78th St. in Hazel Dell.

The suggested admission is one Lego set per family, said Gretchen Kipp, a teacher at King’s Way.

Luke attended King’s Way, where his father, Steve, serves as a principal.

In March, Clark County commissioners approved naming a sports field complex next to the schools in memory of Luke. Construction has begun on the Luke Jensen Sports Park; fields are expected to be game-ready by spring 2012.

The donated Lego sets will be given to the Children’s Cancer Association and Doernbecher Children’s Hospital in Portland.

Kipp said profits will be divided among Doernbecher’s, CCA, Children’s Healing Art Project and Lens of Hope, which offers free photography services to families with a member who has cancer.

Kipp said the event will celebrate Luke’s positive outlook.

A flier for the carnival quotes Luke: “I don’t have time to worry about the things that could happen. I am too busy thinking of all the happy things that have happened.”

Grace through CHAP

2011-05-17T09:31:00.000-07:00

Sunday morning I donned my paint covered overalls and headed over to the soon to be new location of CHAP for a "paint party", to get the space ready for the grand opening next month. I was prepared to be handed a roller and can of white paint to make the space fresh and new. I was not prepared for the next 2 1/2 hours. I introduced myself and said I was there to help and was greeted by a young woman who proceeded to hand me a tray of chartreuse paint and a brush. I was instructed to pick a wall and paint around and behind the graffiti. I began to paint around the letters not reading the words at the beginning. I eavesdropped as two teens painted and discussed what they would be wearing to prom. Someone's docked i-pod filled the room with music. When I stepped back to refill my paint tray, I saw the walls in the large warehouse for the first time. It took my breath away. I asked one of the other painters who wrote these words on the walls and was told that there had been a "party" the night before for parents who had lost their children to cancer, to have their words and the words of their passed children, live on through the walls of the new CHAP space. I was overcome with emotion as I read these words that I had the honor of painting around, as if I was adding an exclamation point to these words of wisdom that brought me to a place of changed perspective. The positive attitude that exuded through these words was beyond words. In the background I began to hear Paul Simon on the i-pod singing Graceland. I began to hear the words as a soundtrack to the painting, thinking about Grace, to do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one's presence, a divine blessing. My body and my hand had begun to tire, but mostly my spirit and heart were overflowing. I had to head home. I took one last look at the room, the painters, the words. I took them all in and floated home filled with a combination of sadness and richness, but mostly deep gratefulness.

Reliving the Wedding Memories!!

2011-05-13T10:29:00.000-07:00

It has been well over a year, and we finally have a wonderful family portrait on canvas, from the fabulous Adam & Tiff wedding to share with you all! We are delighted with the work that Canvas on Demand did with the picture. It feels great to relive all the festivities and joy once again!

The Sun

2011-05-11T16:52:00.000-07:00

The Sun

Have you ever seen
anything
in your life
more wonderful

than the way the sun,
every evening,
relaxed and easy,
floats toward the horizon

and into the clouds or the hills,
or the rumpled sea,
and is gone–
and how it slides again

out of the blackness,
every morning,
on the other side of the world,
like a red flower

streaming upward on its heavenly
oils,
say, on a morning in early summer,
at its perfect imperial distance–
and have you ever felt for anything
such wild love–
do you think there is anywhere, in any language,
a word billowing enough
for the pleasure

that fills you,
as the sun
reaches out,
as it warms you

as you stand there,
empty-handed–
or have you too
turned from this world–

or have you too
gone crazy
for power,
for things?

~Mary Oliver~

Last night was the last evening that we would be "dancing" to Mary Oliver's The Sun. It was the third time I had the privilege of moving to this amazing poem. The visual way that Mary Oliver combines her words particularly speaks to me. I can grab onto and see each of her carefully chosen and placed words, and then begin to sculpt them with my hands, my body and my mind. It is so easy to get lost in her words and in doing so find yourself. Each time I show up to dance since my foot injury, the dance reinvents itself. Not by any means the way I would dance if this was a choice, but for now it has to be the only dance I can dance.

The phrase that blindly chose me last night was "the sun, every evening". As always we each went around in the circle speaking our phrase, and then on the second go round spoke of how those particular words spoke to us at that moment in time. For me, it made me see how much I cherish that special sacred window of time each evening, when my beloved comes home and we share wine and conversation and dinner. It is usually the first time I am seeing him that day, so for me it is a beginning, like a new day, a sunrise. My dance felt rich and full, as I embraced and danced those words. I returned home feeling filled up only to be met with many emotions that I had to process as we continue on this journey of healing together.

Getting the new "CHAP House" Ready to Roll!

2011-05-11T09:24:00.000-07:00

Greetings Fabulous CHAP Volunteers!!!!

You're invited to join us at an

Open House Painting Party

next Sunday, May 15th!!!

Come and help us paint the new and improved CHAP Art Factory!

Anytime between

10 am - 5 pm

@ the future home of CHAP

1703 NW 16th Avenue, Portland, OR 97209

Questions? 503.243.5294

RSVP to info@chap.name

We hope to see you there!!!!

Hasta la Pasta,

Mr. Bossy and everyone at CHAP

info@chap.name
503.243.5294

Children's Healing Art Project (CHAP)
www.chap.name

2011 Street Party Gala: Mixed Media on Pavement

2011-05-11T09:17:00.000-07:00

2011 Gala: Mixed Media on Pavement

You are invited to join us for a lively celebration of PNCA + MoCC at an elegant, tented dinner on the PNCA campus at 1241 NW Johnson St.
Animation by Matthew Seely ’13

2011 Street Party Gala from PNCA on Vimeo.

The 9th annual gala will feature:

A delicious, seasonal meal by Art of Catering;

Student talent: A private viewing of the 2011 Senior Thesis Exhibition

Creative Direction by XPLANE and a unique, reimagined format;

A dynamic paddle raise led by auctioneer Johnna Wells, Benefit Auctions 360;

Fantastic entertainment provided by BodyVox;

Free valet parking;

An After Party where you can dance all night to 80s Video Dance Attack with VJ Kittyrox;

AFTER PARTY ONLY TICKETS

Individual tickets: $250
Table of ten: $2500

For sponsorship information, or to purchase tables and tickets please call:

503.821.8882
rsvp@pnca.edu

Chair Affair + 2011 Final Tally Surpasses Expectations!!

2011-05-11T09:11:00.000-07:00

CHAIR AFFAIR+

THANK YOU to all of the talented contributing artists, generous event sponsors, tireless volunteers, and supportive donors and guests who gathered last week for two festive nights of CHAIR AFFAIR+ to raise $130,000 for the Warehouse.

Kudos to the volunteer Chair, Miriam Hecht, and her talented team of committee members and event volunteers who spent countless hours planning a successful and memorable party. The amount raised through this effort means that another 900 families will benefit from Warehouse services in the months ahead. Thank you everyone for a job well done!

Updates on What's Happening at CHAP in May

2011-05-11T09:08:00.000-07:00

May Happenings at CHAP

First everBossierthancancerfundraising extravaganza.

4-7pm Saturday May 14^th
@ CHAP3.0.......1703 NW 16^th.....or the soon-to-be...1601 NW Savier
503.243.5294

Potluck
Bossier than cancer T's
Bossier than cancer wristbands
Bossier than cancer hair pruning....head shaving, bang trimming,
and a variety of possibilities between these two hair options........

Don't miss the world premier of the

Dawnn of the Reverse Mullet.

Wear CHAP clothing as there will be lotza of house paint painting going on.
Be the nearly-first people to paint our nearly-new space.
As Bossy Dawnn says this is a fundraiser to raise fund$

BYOB..................Bring your own Bossy
BYOFD+F.....Bring your own food, drinks + friends
BYOooK...............Bring your own, or others, kids
B$...........................Bring cash
BYOSHA....Bring your own SUPER healing attitudes

Bring it BOSSY!
Run Like A Mother

THANK YOU to everyone, organizers (Anne Clemens!),
runners, and volunteers who made this first annual event a success.
It was a sellout crowd and CHAP had a blast.
A special congratulations to Maria, a former CHAPkid that came in 3rd
in her age division.

7 Murals 7 Days Update

Thank you New Seasons for hosting our murals and for all of your
enthusiasm for having them at your stores.
Thanks also to partners Clear Channel , Miller Paint, RACC,
Work for Art, Oregon Art Commission, MCCC and
the CHAP Art Clubers who painted the murals.

Run Like a Mother!

2011-05-04T17:41:00.000-07:00

Well, I certainly can't run like a mother on Mother's Day but I certainly can work the race to benefit CHAP this year. Even if I wasn't still healing from my broken toe, running has never been my thing. The mission of Run Like a Mother® is to fuel a woman’s journey toward health and wellness, as well as empower with education and training programs and inspire communities, events and races. Run Like a Mother® Isn’t Just a Race, It’s A Way of Life. This year the proceeds from the race will go to The Children's Healing Art Project, an organization that I just began working with. I am looking forward to cheering on the runners as I work the sidelines knowing that I will also be cheering for the kids, healthy or healing, through CHAP! Let the race begin!

Drum Roll Please!!!

2011-05-04T11:25:00.000-07:00

Our preliminary total for Chair Affair is $128,000.. that is money raised as of today.. our goal for budgeting purposes was $100,000!!

Our wish was to raise at least as much as last year which was $112,000. In addition to the money raised, we have many new friends

and donors for the Warehouse. We are continuing to sell the last few art pieces chairs on-line so we expect the final income number to rise over the next few weeks. I am very proud to have been a part of such a successful event. I now plan to work over at the Community Warehouse Estate Store at least once a month to help sell the amazing remaining pieces of art as well as the phenomenal furniture and other decorative items that people have donated that are for sale each week at great prices.

Check out how many chairs + have sold!!!

2011-05-02T16:18:00.000-07:00

WOW! The final tallies are not yet in, but if you check out the Chair Affair website you can see how many awesome creations have sold. There are still a few left if you missed the event. If you visit the website now, you can still purchase the amazing remaining works of one of a kind art! Thank you everyone for supporting this fabulous event and even more fabulous non-profit organization. I felt honored to work amongst such powerhouse volunteers on this event and also thoroughly enjoyed creating my chair! Until next year...........My wheels are already spinning!!

The Chair Affair is A Great Success!! More to follow.......

2011-05-01T10:11:00.000-07:00

Well.........big exhale......... Thursday and Friday night's big Chair Affair events were a smashing success! The tallies are not in yet but I know we will no doubt all be pleasantly surprised! The focus of the first evening's events was the big ticket auction items as well as the wonderful paddle raise for the Warehouse. That said, The Very Satisfied Caterpillar chair created by Tiff and Adam were quite a hit and sold the first night for full price!! Yeah!! I was a proud mama as I monitored and talked up the kids' section. I had a bid on my Curious George chair by a woman without small kids in her life. My heart was filled when she told me she would donate the chair to the Doernbecker Children's Hospital if she won it. It made me think about making more children's items for the hospital in the coming year. More wonderful possibilities to fill my intention life of service. Friday, the focus was on chairs plus. I loved greeting the artists as they arrived and gave them their name tag that had a picture of their creation on it. How great to put a face to the chair! I did my share of mingling as well. A highlight was meeting a man who kept lingering over my Curious George rocker. I happened upon him as he was placing his bid as well as leaving me a little note that it would be for his 5 month old son Luke if he won. We spoke a while and he told me he was not ready to make the top guaranteed price at that time and that if he won it would be fate. Later in the evening he tracked me down to tell me he could not risk losing the chair by being out-bid and he had decided to buy it at it's full price! I was delighted and told him to cherish this time with Luke and enjoy the chair as I reflect with deep motherly heartfelt love celebrating my "little boy's" birthday today, May day, as he turns 32!! It was only yesterday that he would have been sitting in this chair rocking as I read him Curious George! How deeply I am filled with a sense of gratefulness and richness for having been a part of such an amazing event- The 2011 Chair Affair, but more importantly the most important part I play in my life, that of mother! I am so grateful that I have a bed to sleep in tonight and every night (especially with my aching feet Thur and Friday!), and am blessed with a home filled with all my needs taken care of to create family. I feel so filled with gratefulness that my work with The Chair Affair committee as artist and volunteer gives me the satisfaction of knowing that other families will experience this feeling as well as they are now able to provide beds and the necessities we all need to turn our house into a home, because of the wonderful work the Community Warehouse does!

The Chair Affair is upon us and Adam & I got to be on TV!

2011-04-26T14:28:00.000-07:00

All the Chair Affair festivities are this week and it is getting very exciting! Adam and I were even able to feature our chairs on a local TV show called Fusion. Check it out! Great fun and a great feature on The Community Warehouse. There are still tickets available so please go to the Community Warehouse site to purchase your tickets for either event!

MADFED Right Brain Auction update

2011-04-14T10:11:00.000-07:00

The MADFED auction event was a huge success!! We are very happy to report that we raised nearly $8,000 for The Right Brain Initiative. I had fun dressing up like June Cleaver, (no I am not ready to post the pix!) certainly a blast from the past and enjoyed registering the guests as they arrived in their 60's MadMen attire. We also helped to raise awareness of our organization among the nearly 150 guests in attendance.

Remember the right brain! It’s not an education without it.

Inspiration for today........

2011-04-13T15:56:00.000-07:00

"Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night."

Edgar Allan Poe

Fusion and The Chair Affair

2011-04-13T15:20:00.000-07:00

This morning Adam and I had a hoot being part of spot filmed about the Chair Affair that will air bright and early (for me at least) this Saturday morning at 8 am, on a show called Fusion on KOIN channel 6 (CBS). The windows at the former Sak's building look wonderful and are overflowing with the amazing artist creations that go around the block at Pioneer Place on SW Yamhill. Adam and I got to feature our chairs,(Tiff was with us in the spirit of their collaboration), as the founder of The Community Warehouse Roz and Miriam the Chair's Chair, educated the community about all that the Community Warehouse and Chair Affair bring to our community. The need is greater than ever, to bring families the basic needs as they begin to set up their household in a new apartment, many for the first time. It brings to our attention the creature comforts that many of us take for granted on a day to day basis. Tickets to the two events are selling quickly and a number of chairs have already been sold, so check the website to either purchase your tickets to these great events or to buy your chair + directly from the website. Don't miss out! Help support this great organization!

CHAPS the Children Healing Art Project

2011-04-13T14:48:00.000-07:00

Last night I attended the orientation for the newest addition to my many passions. I will be devoting some of my time to CHAPS the Children's Healing Art Project. It seems to be a perfect fit as it combines many of my skills and background explorations, combining art therapy, my love of kids, getting dirty creating art, teaching, social work and everything I have gleaned on my journey thus far. I am looking forward to rolling up my sleeves, flinging paint, watch kids jump on mattresses, throwing paint, facilitating kids making art, and assisting however I am needed. This will also touch on that delicate spot within us all, that lies between hopefulness and fear, when it comes to children faced with life threatening illnesses and chronic challenges, that they are trying to deal with through the creative process. Kids of all ages, wherever they may be in their lives, in their day to day challenges of just growing up, and finding a place to fit in, to belong, and finding an outlet to express themselves. To be able to make art that in UNCONDITIONAL RIGHT! I am passionate about the ability of art to heal us all. It is essential. You simply cannot do it wrong, unless you do not do it at all. I am very excited to begin this new chapter......

Check out all the Chair Affair Creations On Line!!

2011-04-07T10:20:00.000-07:00

All the work for this year's Chair Affair to benefit the Community Warehouse are now up and running on the website with chances to "buy now" if you see something you absolutely love and cannot make it to the upcoming two wonderful auction events. You can also see all the great creations downtown in Pioneer Place old Sak's building windows on SW 4th and Yamhill. The chairs will be there for tonight's free First Thursday opening reception, as well as throughout the month, culminating in the big events at the same venue. I will be working at The Right Brain Initiative's collaboration with the MADFED auction tonight so I won't be at First Thursday but come see me at the big events April 28 & 29! There are still tickets available but happily they are selling fast (we are already ahead of last year!!!) Enjoy looking at all the chairs +. I am also proud to have my Curious George rocker joined by Adam & Tiff's Hungry Caterpillar rocker this year! This year's event will be the biggest yet! Come out and join us!

http://www.communitywarehouse.org/chair-affair-2011

2011-03-20T13:08:00.000-07:00

"People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light within." ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross~

Last night I had the extreme privilege of witnessing a dance performance choreographed by Meshi Chavez and inspired by Walt Whitman's poem "We Two Boys". It was truly one of the most amazing performances I have ever had the honor of experiencing. In a powerful yet vulnerable and truly authentic way, Meshi and Richard took the viewers on, and into, a journey that explored our sense of self in this world; where we fit in, how we struggle to stay true to ourselves, despite the constraints society puts upon us to be something other than our true selves. Meshi took a piece of his heart out, presented it to all of us to share and revealed something so rich, universal and profound, that I am forever impacted by this. I will never be the same, for having experienced this amazing evening. By experiencing last night, I also was given the gift of realizing the power and necessity of being the observer, and that was a huge awakening in light of the prior evening's frustrations for me at Reflective Dance Practice. His choreography and movement are a true gift to the art world, and I am proud to call him my friend and fellow dancer in this family community I am so blessed to be a part of, as my spiritual practice, however that shows up for me right now.

Yearning and Threshold

2011-03-19T11:18:00.002-07:00

Then the quiet set in, outside, but not within me. I tried to engage, but found myself with my back to the "village" as Winky phrased it, of dancers, as we began to move in our own way. The idea of thinking of a village of dancers that are a part of a unit, rather than being a witness that somehow places us separate, outside the group. Last night, I felt more like a witness rather than a part of a village.

We meditated on the idea of "Threshold". A perfect and powerful word for right now, both personally and globally. Ourselves being vertical conduits between the sky and the earth. Also our ability to be horizontal conduits to give out from ourselves to the rest of the world, especially in a time of feeling helpless to heal those who are trying to find peace and healing amidst natural disaster.
thresh·old

1. A piece of wood or stone placed beneath a door; a doorsill.

2. An entrance or a doorway.

3. The place or point of beginning; the outset.

4. The point that must be exceeded to begin producing a given effect or result or to elicit a response: a low threshold of pain.

For me, this brought up many things, but especially painfully resonated, as the child in me, who was constantly reminded and judged negatively, that my threshold for pain is very low, a judgement of a condition that cannot be anything different than it is (see my Living The Princess & The Pea earlier entry).
I also meditated on the image of threshold a being a transition from one place to another, a gateway of sorts. Being on one side, yet yearning to be on the other. I meditated on yearning.
yearn·ing

A persistent, often wistful or melancholy desire;

prolonged unfulfilled desire or need,
longing.....
hungriness.....
desire , the feeling that accompanies an unsatisfied state,
hankering, yen - a yearning for something or to do something,
pining - a feeling of deep longing,
wishfulness - an unrealistic yearning,
wistfulness - a sadly pensive longing,
nostalgia - longing for something past,
discontent, discontentedness, discontentment - a longing for something better than the present situation

One member of my village of dancers, met me where I was, and danced tenderly with me. He later shared that he usually feels shy dancing with others, but did not last night. Oh I know that all too well. There was a feeling of safety. Toward the end of the three hours, as I lay on the floor, legs over a stool, eyes closed, my back to the group, I was suddenly aware that my "curls" were being lightly, lovingly, danced with by one of my beloved dance partners. She playfully and tenderly interacted with me through my hair, and then danced away. At first, I did not know who it was but I got a glimpse of her as she danced away. It turned my sadness of that moment, into pure joy and put a smile on my face, and in my heart.

At the end we gathered in a circle. We discussed this place of yearning and how we all feel this at some time, at some level. The gift is in accepting. That the yearning is a part of the living, the growing, the connecting. The lesson to be learned in all this, is how to be with that yearning, to accept it, without needing for it to be different. I suppose that, therein lies the contradiction.

As I reflect on it all this morning, I have no regrets for having gone last night. My body did hurt more afterward. My spirit felt and still feels conflicted. My heart felt better from having gone, and been with some of my favorite dancers. But, I am filled with sadness though, and am still struggling with the yearning, the learning. How do I begin to allow, surrender, accept this yearning without needing it to be any different? How? Yes, indeed, how?

Portland Neighborhood Pix Pic!

2011-03-19T09:42:00.000-07:00

How delighted I was once again this morning to find out one of my photos "Inside a Purple World" was selected again to be featured on the Portland Neighborhood blog. Check it out! They have also posted a few of my others including one of my favorites "Let The Games Begin"- a shot of a "street fight" over a dropped "doggie box" of lunch, complete with an audience!

Portland Taiko and The Right Brain Initiative

2011-03-17T17:59:00.000-07:00

Today I went to Oak Grove Elementary School to photography a second grade Taiko Drumming event as part of The Right Brain Initiative. Due to a last minute rescheduling glitch, only a short bit of the performance was able to be documented. The kids were having a blast and seemed to have learned so much after only practicing with the Taiko musicians four times. This picture captures a bit of the moment frozen in time for me.

Finished Chair Affair Rocker!

2011-03-16T12:18:00.000-07:00

Hooray!!! This morning I put the finishing touches on my piece that will be auctioned off at the Chair Affair this year to benefit The Community Warehouse. I am excited about my little cutie this year and it is such a coincidence that I began this chair a few months ago and the Portland Children's Museum just opened their Curious George exhibit! Is that synchronicity or what!? I hope that will make my little gem a hot ticket! Here is a glimpse of the chair I named "Curious George and The Rocking Reader Chair".

This year we are delighted that not only the previews of the over 100 artist chairs, but the events themselves, will be in the old Sak's building downtown! Please check out the warehouse website for updates on the upcoming Chair Affair previews and events, as well as to see pictures of the chairs and artists as they get posted over the next few weeks. There will be opportunities to "buy now" via paypal before the actual Chair Affair event, so check back often to see the wonderful offerings that will help raise money for an amazing charity that helps provide the basic necessities that we all sometimes take for granted, like beds, dishes and cooking utensils to families trying to get back on their feet. I am passionate about this organization and this event so join me in supporting The Community Warehouse. If you don't feel inclined to bid on a Chair Affair chair, you can help support the warehouse by keeping them in mind when you are looking for a new home for your gently used housewares. The Warehouse happily welcomes all donations of goods!

Curious George and The Rocking Reading Chair

Your child can rock and read the day away in this comfy pillowed rocker complete with blankie and book pouch filled with Curious George books with room for more!

A Feast for the Eyes

2011-03-03T10:20:00.000-08:00

As part of Jenni's graduation gift from The Bauman Natural Chef program, I made a book chronicling her journey in pictures. I copied the pictures from her blog over the past 5 months and made them into a Blurb book. Take a look at A Feast for the Eyes if you'd like and be prepared to have your mouth water! The food Jenni and her class created are truly a feast for the eyes.

The Chair Affair 2011 is coming, grab your seat!

2011-03-02T14:04:00.000-08:00

The Fifth Annual Chair Affair +

GET READY for 2011 CHAIR AFFAIR+, Community Warehouse’s major fundraiser featuring over 100 “re”created chairs and other home furnishings donated by our talented and generous local artists.

This year we’ll have more ways for you to support Community Warehouse:

NEW! “Reserved Seat” dinner on Thursday, April 28 featuring the first opportunity to bid on “chairs+”, our hot seat cocktail hour, catered dinner, live auction, celebrity host, great people and plenty of fun!

RETURNING! On Friday, April 29 it's the same great party as previous years—yet even better! A chance to bid on the “chairs+”, the hot seat cocktail, cheap seats, box seats, wine, food, artists, and lots of creative ways to lend your support.

Both events help Community Warehouse help others!

Ticket sales, artists' info, chair+ photos coming soon! Last year was a sell-out so don't delay and tell your friends about the 2011 Chair Affair +! More information to follow............

What an amazing weekend!!!

2011-03-01T15:12:00.000-08:00

They whirlwind joy of this weekend was indescribable but I will try anyway. With fears of being snowed in on Thursday morning, the sun broke through the snow on the runway and we left on time, Oakland California bound! Jenni's graduation showcase feast was beyond delicious! It was a feast for the eyes as well as the stomach, heart and soul. The cooking classroom was transformed into The Farmstead Kitchen, decorated with memorabilia that transported us all to a simpler time in life, with simple, nutrient dense, healing foods. It was truly one of the best meals I have ever eaten! Jenni was the showcase coordinator as well as menu designer, and resident DJ! I was so incredibly proud of her. We then flew back the next day for the annual Permanente Dental Associates meeting/dinner where Michael was awarded the first annual Distinguished Dentist Award! Wow, I can't think of anyone more worthy of this award. My heart is filled with such pride and love for the great accomplishments as Jenni and Michael shined through this weekend.

JAM Photo Project

2011-02-18T10:00:00.000-08:00

I must admit when my friend and fellow artist and visionary Eddy asked me to help head up a photography project for JAM Jewish Art Month I was conflicted because I do not identify with any religious group and tend to avoid the possible limitations that can be imposed by religious labels. For me, I most closely identify my religious beliefs in the words of the Dalai Lama "My religion is very simple, my religion is kindness".

But I was up to the challenge. The idea behind the project is to work with 13-14 year old teens, with the objective of self discovery, of allowing their religious/spiritual identity to unfold through the photo documentary approach.

We met and tried to clarify our objectives, realizing that the objectives are still out of focus. That through the process of daily photo taking and posting them on our Flickr group, we can more clearly communicate to each other and ultimately to ourselves what our religious or spiritual place is in the world. We will meet periodically, snap away, talk about what we are discovering, what is pulling us to photograph, and maybe understand that what we are drawn to, tells us and others something about ourselves. It is an uncertain journey that is exciting. Who knows where it will end and what will come out of it? Therein lies the interest for me; the not knowing.

We hope to create a self-published book at the end of this journey, as well as have an exhibit of some of the framed photos. I suppose this will give us all a glimpse into a sense of our identity, and it's moment to moment changing. Like the snap of a photo, a frozen moment in time. Who knows if this process will blur or focus my own spiritual sense of place?

The Chair Affair 2011

2011-02-15T16:49:00.000-08:00

The chair I am currently attempting to finish (foot willing) is a small child's rocking chair with a Curious George theme For The Community Warehouse 5th annual Chair Affair fundraiser. It will be finished with paint of primary colors and it has a Curious George fabric pillow, arm rests and attached tote with Curious George books and a "blankie" too. Everything to make a great child reading ritual comforting and fun! The working title is Curious George and the Reading Rocking Chair.

Sowing Seeds- A thought for today

2011-02-07T10:26:00.000-08:00

"Perhaps the earth can teach us, as when everything seems dead in winter and later proves to be alive"

~Pablo Neruda~

Cloud Mountains Disappointment

2011-02-01T12:47:00.000-08:00

I have been struggling the last few days, with the decision I had to make, whether or not I would be able to go to Cloud Mountain this coming weekend to attend a three day silent Buddhist retreat on Metta, lovingkindness. I have been in battle with myself, my mind, my body, since my foot injury, and realized this morning that going would cause more stress, more pain, more challenges, and probably make the healing process that much slower since I am supposed to stay off my foot. There are stairs to climb and uneven terrain at Cloud Mountain plus all the other navigating that I would have to do. I realized I knew my answer. I am so disappointed, angry, feeling sorry for myself and feeling cheated by injury once again. A feeling that I am a witness to life passing me by. When can I move forward with my life, and go down a road without speed bumps? I know I have to learn to accept what is, and stop wasting the anger and stress that are energy suckers. And I do know, that there will inevitably be more speed bumps ahead, regardless of which road I choose to travel down. I know there will be other retreats, and that there has to be a lesson for me to learn here. After all, isn't there always, even if I can't seem to see it through the self inflicted brain fog? So Metta..............lovingkindness..............should I need a retreat to create the opportunity to practice this on myself a little. Let the learning begin I suppose, and not wait for the next retreat. I know my "Wizard of Oz" bible tells me I have everything I need inside me already, but sometimes it feels so unreachable. What stands in the way is me. I know that, but that doesn't seem to make it any easier and I don't know why I stand in my own way. Patience and self care once again present their challenges to me. I guess I haven't "gotten it" yet. Maybe once I get it, the opportunities to practice won't be as pressing, as they will become a part of my daily living. Maybe.......... For now, I do what I can to get through this current challenge the best way I can. This morning I was reading a poem by Octavio Paz called After. It spoke to me about hope and I share it~

After

~ Octavio Paz ~

after chopping off all the arms that reached out to me;

after boarding up all the windows and doors;

after filling all the pits with poisoned water;

after building my house on the rock of no,

inaccessible to flattery and fear;

after cutting off my tongue and eating it;

after hurling handfuls of silence

and monosyllable of scorn at my loves;

after forgetting my name;

and the name of my birthplace;

and the name of my race;

after judging and sentencing myself

to perpetual waiting,

and perpetual loneliness, I heard

against the stones of my dungeon of syllogisms,

the humid, tender, insistent

onset of spring.

....................but still haven't been able

2011-01-28T12:49:00.000-08:00

The last two weeks, as I longingly yearn to dance, I have been gifted with the words that my fellow dancers have been dancing by Winky, so I can be moved in my heart, spirit and my words instead of with my outside body. Tuesday night, "G", one of my soul sisters and a dance/life touchstone for me, chose my line for me- ........but still haven't been able, for me to dance in solitude, at home. Surely Mary Oliver wrote the phrase for me. Thank you Georgianna for knowing intuitively and blindly what I needed to dance. I am moved, without movement.

The Teachers

~Mary Oliver~

Owl in the black morning,

mockingbird in the burning

slants of the sunny afternoon

declare so simply

to the world

everything I have tried but still

haven’t been able

to put into words,

so I do not go

far from that school

with its star-bright

or blue ceiling,

and I listen to those teachers,

and others too --

the wind in the trees

and the water waves --

for they are what lead me

from the dryness of self

where I labor

with the mind-steps of language --

lonely, as we all are

in the singular,

I listen hard

to the exuberances

of the mockingbird and the owl,

the waves and the wind.

And then, like peace after perfect speech,

such stillness.

..................but still haven't been able.............
~ to accept my limitations,
~ to not feel angry at myself for fracturing my metatarsal bone while doing what I love~~~~~ dance,
~ to deal with the frustrations of yet another limitation,
~ that the injury will prevent me from dancing for 6-8 weeks,
~ to be at peace with my body where it is at this moment,
~ to ask for help,
~ to not feel inadequate and dependent,
~ to be patient,
~ to know this is not permanent,
~ to accept what is and not be looking for reasons & answers,
~ to not be at war within and with my body,
~ to know that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional

to quote Mary Oliver in this poem that once again never fails to speak to me,

"from the dryness of self

where I labor

with the mind-steps of language --"

The Poem I Must Dance in My Heart Today

2011-01-18T12:49:00.000-08:00

The Journey

by Mary Oliver

"One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice--

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried

with it's stiff fingers

at the very foundations--

though their melancholy was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice,

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do--

determined to save

the only life you could save."

I am angry, I am frustrated, I feel cheated and I struggle with the question "why does everything I do that gives me pleasure, cause me pain?"

Friday night SCORE was amazing. I danced into such a deep place that I wanted to stay there forever. Even during the last 30 minutes, after I intuitively knew that I had broken my toe dancing, I continued on, compelled by something very deep, that kept me from listening to my body, and instead just listen to my soul. Now I am faced with the reality that my middle toe is badly broken at the foot joint, and that I will be on crutches and will probably not be able to dance for 6-8 weeks. At least not be able to "dance" the way I want to define it. Now the challenge is to dance through the "why me, not again" feelings. To learn to dance the "blips in the road" and to accept that when I can return to dance, it will be with baby steps, and sometimes with no steps at all. Maybe a deep dance that comes from within, that does not have to involve my external body at all. A dance that will involve that deeper soulful body and spirit that has to learn to be free to dance, using this body, at this moment, the only way it can dance. I have to let go of the "I want it to be different" song, and learn to accept what is, right now. It is not a challenge that I welcome or enter into willingly but after all....... this is my dance today. The only one I can do.

Create Plenty fomerly Leave No Plastic Behind

2011-01-12T20:26:00.000-08:00

I was delighted to stop by REI the last week in December and see the LNPB quilt displayed in the store! You can grab a bit of a look at it including my piece in the attached pictures. Enjoy!

The Mothertree Project Film

2011-01-11T15:00:00.000-08:00

I was delighted to get a first glimpse of Ian Lucero's film documentation of Helen Heiberts "The Mothertree Project" that I had the honor of participating in as a crocheter and in the closing exhibit performance in Portland. It brought back so many wonderful memories for me of the evening back in May of last year. I moved with the others around the Sculpture and crocheted. I also had the honor of both reading other women's words, as well as my own, in a voice over in the film. Ian's film really captured the magical beauty of the event. I spoke words about how the project conjured up many emotions for me. My mother always knitted and crocheted throughout my life offering comfort and warmth to the entire family. The performance followed a particularly difficult visit with her in Florida, as she dealt with health issues. I was also reminded of my childhood in elementary school, going to the New York City local park on May Day, to do our annual Maypole Dance. Then I spoke of my son Adam, who was born on May 1, May Day, 31 years ago, and facing some health and injury challenges as well. I held this all in my heart and spirit as I participated in the Mothertree Project Performance event. I will always cherish this rich opportunity. Please click on the above link to enjoy the glimpse of the lovely film.

...and my look shot upward;

2011-01-05T10:00:00.000-08:00

When I entered the dance space last night I was embraced by a deep nurturing hug from Winky and the phrase, "you made it"! Yes I did. Showing up is half of it after all, isn't it?

We began the evening, with a bit of a closed eyed meditation and reflection on which part of our body was calling to us. I knew immediately that it was my sacrum, sore perhaps from beginning yoga class the night before, or calling to me, the sacrum- the sacred.

The word "sacrum", meaning "sacred" in Latin, lives on in English anatomy as the name for the large heavy bone at the base of the spine.

The Romans called the bone the "os sacrum," which literally meant the "holy bone" and the Greeks termed it the "hieron osteon," the same thing, the "holy bone".

We then proceeded, as always, to blindly choose our Mary Oliver line to dance. Mine was, "and my look shot upward" from the ever so poignant poem "Snow Geese". We then reflected on one word that called to us, mine being "upward". We took a moment to connect the focus of our body part and our word. It was clear to me that my dance of the evening and my dance in life is about looking upward and inward for spiritual guidance, to touch the sacred, however that shows up for me, in this time of searching for strength and wisdom to meet the challenges that life is presenting to me. I danced richly as I felt the drum beat of the music resonate deeply within my body.

"Snow Geese"~~ Mary Oliver~~

"Oh, to love what is lovely, and will not last!
What a task
to ask
of anything, or anyone,
yet it is ours,
and not by the century or the year, but by the hours.
One fall day I heard
above me, and above the sting of the wind, a sound
I did not know, and my look shot upward; it was
a flock of snow geese, winging it
faster than the ones we usually see,
and, being the color of snow, catching the sun
so they were, in part at least, golden. I
held my breath
as we do
sometimes
to stop time
when something wonderful
has touched us
as with a match,
which is lit, and bright,
but does not hurt
in the common way,
but delightfully,
as if delight
were the most serious thing
you ever felt.
The geese
flew on,
I have never seen them again.
Maybe I will, someday, somewhere.
Maybe I won't.
It doesn't matter.
What matters
is that, when I saw them,
I saw them

as through the veil, secretly, joyfully, clearly"

BEHOLD

2010-12-29T10:37:00.000-08:00

Definition of BEHOLD

transitive verb

: to perceive through sight or apprehension : see

: to gaze upon : observe

intransitive verb

—used in the imperative especially to call attention

— be·hold·er noun

Examples of BEHOLD

Those who have beheld the beauty of the desert never forget it.
beholds the immense complexity of life on earth>

Synonyms: appreciate, apprehend, assimilate, comprehend, catch, catch on (to), cognize, compass, conceive, cotton (to or on to), decipher, decode, dig, discern, get, grasp, grok, intuit, know, make, make out, perceive, recognize, register, savvy, see, seize, sense, tumble (to), twig, understand

How do I dance, how can I dance, how can I begin to begin again. When you feel like the rug has been pulled out from under you, and that your world, as you have known it has been forever changed? I did not know how to give myself permission to go to dance on Sunday. To have fun? How is that even a possibility? I went.................It was incredible as I "danced my life" as it was in that moment, in that body, in the now. When we gathered before the dance, Winky presented us with the contemplation of the word "BEHOLD". Wow, how powerful that word resonated for me. She spoke about it in terms of being not a witness who is separate from the other dancers, but being a part of the whole as you notice the others with awareness. A part of, rather than a part from. As I danced my life, the pain, the anger, the fear I was feeling, and emotions that I could not and cannot yet name, I felt filled with a power that I had never experienced. The emotions raged through every inch of my body as I danced, as though I were a whirling dervish. Dervish is said to literally mean "one who opens the doors". It was so cathartic and I felt alive. As I danced my emotions, and my emotions danced me, the word BEHOLD kept resonating and transforming. I thought about how if I could just "BE" whether it be present, strong, available, open to receive, listen, help, care for, exist for the sake of existing for oneself or another; that there is a true purpose in this word, this work, "TO BE". By taking better care of myself, the quality of my available to the the others in my life is stronger and richer. By being able to "BE" I felt that I could better "HOLD" my loved ones in times of trouble and in times of joy. To truly be able to be present to whatever comes up in our lives. Last night I returned to dance, although again with a feeling of guilt and my Mary Oliver phrase was "know what matters". Yes! I danced that phrase and held it deep within my being, and contemplate on that now as well.

I am now trying to reconcile my feelings about this shift in our world, and trying to come to terms with accepting that things are not always the way we wanted them to be, the way we planned and expected them to be. Life unfolds the way it unfolds, and we have to learn to dance that life. So how do I begin to do this? We put one foot in front of the other, we do life as we always have, even though things might now be different. I have to give myself and my loves permission to dance, to cry, to be angry, to be fearful and to laugh. Yes to laugh. So we went to see "The Big Lebowski" on the big screen at the old Clinton Theater and we laughed. We laughed hard. I laughed every time Lebowski said that "the rug tied the room together". And the movie went on even when they pulled the rug out from under him......................

Living The Princess and The Pea

2010-12-09T12:05:00.000-08:00

I just finished a mixed media sculptural piece entitled "Living The Princess and The Pea" . It is the culmination of a year of collecting the labels that were sewn into the necklines of clothing when I purchased them or had collected over time. It is always necessary for me to remove the labels before I am able to comfortably wear the clothing because of a hypersensitivity condition that I named The Princess and The Pea Syndrome. Upon further research, I found that I was not alone. The sculpture consists of a "quilt" of sorts, of all the labels I attached by sewing them to two dressmaker's patterns. Once sewn, I then proceeded to dip the two parts of the "blouse" into beeswax and then form them into torso like shapes. They cannot stand alone and need each other for support. Inside the vessel, the void, that the two wax dress quilt pieces create, is a spool of long nails, pointed side up, and resting upon them is one small white down feather. I feel this piece narrates my feeling of having lived with this condition my entire life. There was something very satisfying about completing the long awaited sculpture. Although it soothes my spirit, it unfortunately doesn't assuage my condition. You can read more about what others have written about their experience living The Princess and The Pea below. The images are of the completed sculpture "Living The Princess and The Pea" including a detail image.

I am quoting other women, including myself who suffer with this sometimes debilitating condition. "I make an effort to make other parts of my life as comfortable as possible, with appropriate clothing, and shoes. When I stand for too long, I have low back pain. In short, I try to do everything I can to enhance my creature comforts in my life, by removing those things which are bothersome. I also have problems with clothing. I don’t think I have a single shirt left that has the manufacturer’s tag still in it. The ones with the pretty metallic designs are especially annoying. I also cut them out of pants, underwear and bras. Thankfully, I don’t own much that does not have easy washing directions. Being around perfume and loud noises are additional irritants to my heightened system. Being around too many people for too long is a drain on my system and usually cause headaches. At the end of the day, I can't wait to remove my underwear and clothing and then am only able to wear a baggy sweatsuit with the shirt tucked smoothly into the pants to keep the elastic off my waist. I was often mocked by my mother for being "too sensitive" and being a pain in the neck to shop with, especially for underwear. If I have a headache earrings have to be very light, and not bounce, or they get left at home. Sometimes even my hair down on my neck is irritating to my skin. Any of this sound familiar? I would imagine it does. We are creatures with hypersensitive nerve endings. Our nervous systems react to many things others are not even aware of. All of this extra irritability adds up to less sleep, and more pain and fatigue. So, how do we deal with the “pea”? I imagine some of the things we need to do are similar, while others will be very individualThe immune system is an integral part of human protection against disease, but the normally protective immune mechanisms can sometimes cause detrimental reactions in the host. Such reactions are known as hypersensitivity reactions, and the study of these is termed immunopathology. Hypersensitivity is a state of altered reactivity in which the body reacts with an exaggerated immune response to a foreign substance
Fibromyalgia syndrome (FMS) is a chronic pain syndrome characterized by central sensitization resulting in hypersensitivity of the skin and deeper tissues as well as fatigue. Possibly the princess in Hans Christian Andersen's 'The Princess and the Pea' suffered from FMS"

As the story goes, making an effort to find a real princess to marry her son, the Prince, the Queen placed a pea on the bed, and covered it with 20 mattresses and 20 feather beds. When the young lady awoke the next morning, she said she had hardly slept at all because of a bump in the bed. The queen said "nobody but a real princess would have such delicate skin."

Rich Sunday

2010-12-07T15:33:00.000-08:00

After feeling under the weather all week, I knew what I needed most, but almost couldn't muster the strength. To go and do what I knew deep within, would lift me to the level that I desperately needed. To allow myself to pull myself out of my funk. I arrived at dance a few minutes early, and had a chance to settle in, to be witness to the other beautiful bodies of the early dance session, moving in and through the space, fully present to their bodies, that moment in time and space. The room began to clear and open for those of us who would dance the second session. I was reminded by J'aime, before I went in, that movement is tied to our lymphatic system and our bodies need to move to heal. I knew I was right in pushing myself to show up. We joined in our opening circle and Winky shared some wonderful visual words that touched me deeply and I began to melt further into myself. She told a bit about the documentary on Annie Leibovitz as she was talking with Mikail Baryshnikov about photographing dance. Leibovitz had come to the conclusion that it was impossible to photograph dance, because "dance is art in air". Wow, need I say more???????
In the evening I had the wonderful opportunity to go to my friend Danelle's house for a meditation sit. I have been wanting to jump start my practice for quite a while now and have felt paralyzed. This was a wonderful opportunity to make room for the quiet, the space between; whether it is space between the words, the thoughts, the breaths or the movements I danced earlier.
I feel so grateful for my community of seekers on the same path.

Best Donate a Dinner Ever!

2010-11-30T14:23:00.000-08:00

Thanks to you, we will be able to feed more seniors than ever this winter. We introduced hundreds of people to Loaves and Fishes Centers, and raise more than $200,000!

If you didn't get a chance, it's not too late to donate a meal. Thank you for helping us reach our goal.

Incredible M.O.M. follow up!

2010-11-29T13:48:00.000-08:00

What an incredible experience and amazing privilege it was to participate the first West Coast Mission of Mercy event at the Convention Center. We as professional Dentists, support staff and volunteers from the community helped to provided 7,844 procedures valuing $829,119 to 1,554 patients in the two days. The Oregon Dental Association worked tirelessly to organize this event that would effect so many lives, more than could have been imagined. It was an experience that I have been having trouble putting words to, but one week later I have to try to express some of what this entire experience meant to me.

As I rolled out of bed at 4:30 am I complained that I was "cold" because the heat had yet to kick on, since we normally don't rise that early. I was "tired". It was too early to eat, but I was "hungry". As we drove up to the Convention Center at 5 am I was stunned to see people already lined up around the large complex. Some, we were told, had been there since the night before in sub-freezing, raining conditions, and most arriving at 4 am with the hopes of having their dental pain and problems relieved. There was no guarantee that they would all be seen that day, but hopes were high. At that moment I realized a new meaning to the words "cold" ,"tired" and "hungry".

As I sat at the table welcoming in the prospective patients, and giving them their name tags, I was overwhelmed with emotion and totally humbled by the experience. Each and every cold, wet, tired person that stepped into the building,sighed with relief, knowing they had finally made it into the warmth of the convention center. They knew that they would be treated that day, was grateful, gracious and cheerful. They blessed us and praised us for the time we were giving them to provide the much needed dental work. Some of the patients had lost healthcare and jobs due to the tough economic status of our state. Some where living out on the street. Some were struggling with drugs and alcohol. Many had small children and babies in their arms, having been waiting for hours in the cold.

What a reality check for my own life and comforts! I do try to live each day honoring my blessings and feeling grateful for my truly wonderful and full life, but this day took me to a new level of appreciation and gratefulness. I know that even with my intent to live a grateful authentic life, things do slip by me in the day to day rushing, that I might not notice and be fully grateful for. What a gift and lesson I learned from the people who came into the Convention Center. There were thousands of people in line and we were only able to let under one thousand in the first day 12 hour day. Some people that were not able to be seen on Monday, remained on to wait in line, sleeping out, with the hopes of being seen on Tuesday, even though the temperatures were falling to record lows with freezing rain and snow.

Some of the media chose to focus on the fact that not everyone in line was treated, or that standing out in the cold is akin to the pain of dentistry. I tried to see beyond that ignorant attitude and did go as far as to write a letter to the editor of the Oregonian, addressing that form of "journalism". Most of the coverage of the event was very positive.

I know we can all learn something from the attitudes of the clients that showed up for MOM. In the afternoon, I escorted patients to continue with their treatment or those who were already done for the day. Some patients where happy to have teeth extracted to relieve their pain, some had their long neglected teeth filled and others left happily with new teeth where no teeth had remained and left with smiles on their faces for the first time. They wrote comments on cards that were posted in the break room throughout the day. One women wrote, that she had been a victim of domestic violence and as a result had her teeth knocked out, and that now she could finally smile with her new teeth. The day was filled with tears of joy and sorrow for many of us. Everyone was treated with respect and everyone left with a feeling of pride. Some people now being able to eat with a comfort that they had never known.

I was filled with pride for my husband Michael and his trusty assistant Alvina providing 12 hours of dental care with barely a break, who are seen in this great picture taken during the day~~

I was also so proud to have been a part of such an amazingly important event. Next year we will work both 5am-6pm days. We went home this time after working just the Monday double shift, feeling incredibly exhausted but pumped with so much adrenaline, so many personal stories to share with each other as we had a wonderful, grateful, warm dinner together. The food tasted so much richer to us because our day's experience. We were filled with such a sense of satisfaction, accomplishment and gratefulness, and such an array of emotions that I am still trying to process.I don't know of anyone on either the giving or receiving end of this event, that was not deeply effected. I for one, have been touched and changed forever having had the honor of working at M.O.M. What a Thanksgiving gift I have been able to receive through M.O.M.

Donate Dinner- Help feed seniors this Thanksgiving! It's not too late

2010-11-17T14:30:00.000-08:00

Got two hours?Greet customers and hand out Donate Dinner cards... it's as easy as that!
Why?
YOUR participation will raise crucial funds to feed the increasing number of local seniors in need of a hot nutritional meal.
When?
The 5 days before Thanksgiving, Nov. 20 - 24, 2010.
Where?
At 28 local grocery stores. We still need volunteers at all of our locations, however the stores listed below have the greatest need. Please click on a store if you would like to volunteer.

Bales Thriftway on Farmington	Lamb's Thriftway on Scholls
Haggen - Murray Hill	Whole Foods - Fremont
New Seasons Market - Orenco Station	Market of Choice

To view a list of all participating stores, click here.

For more information, visit the Donate Dinner website at www.donatedinner.org

~~~and not for the sake of winning but for sheer delight and gratitude....

2010-11-17T09:42:00.000-08:00

Last nights dance was incredibly and especially rich for me. We began with our blindly chosen line from Mary Oliver's poem "Invitation" for inspiration. I just loved the line that chose me

........."and not for the sake of winning
but for sheer delight and gratitude"

The line conjured in my mind the idea that I don't have to always have the answers and explanations for everything. I don't have to always struggle to "figure it out". That sometimes there are no explanations. Things just are what they are. The beauty is in the process of life, just because........... It also made me think of my recent submission to the Portland Building for the installation "Waiting". I am making it for the sake of sheer delight and gratitude. That is enough. Whether it is chosen and seen by the public would be an added honor but I am satisfied with the process of creating it for the sake of itself. I am grateful................

Invitation~~ Mary Oliver

"Oh do you have time
to linger
for just a little while
out of your busy

and very important day
for the goldfinches
that have gathered
in a field of thistles

for a musical battle,
to see who can sing
the highest note,
or the lowest,

or the most expressive of mirth,
or the most tender?
Their strong, blunt beaks
drink the air

as they strive
melodiously
not for your sake
and not for mine

and not for the sake of winning
but for sheer delight and gratitude—
believe us, they say,
it is a serious thing

just to be alive
on this fresh morning
in this broken world.
I beg of you,

do not walk by
without pausing
to attend to this
rather ridiculous performance.

It could mean something.
It could mean everything.
It could be what Rilke meant, when he wrote:
You must change your life."

We ended dancing to the incredible song by Tina Turner called "Beyond". I had never heard it before. Its words are so amazing. It is part chant, part spiritual, part Buddhist prayer, and the words deeply touched my soul. If you have a chance to listen to this 7 minute jewel of a recording, you will be enriched beyond words. She fills you with a spiritual energy that is palpable. I can't find the lyrics written anywhere, but maybe this is for the best. It has to be listened to in order to fully experience the power and beauty of her most recent collaboration.

S.M.A.R.T.

2010-11-16T16:30:00.000-08:00

This morning was another delightful time at Cesar Chavez Elementary School reading with second graders, as part of S.M.A.R.T., or Start Making A Reader Today. Willante was out today but I had fun reading with Alex for the first time, and reading with my regular student Soloria. These kids are so enthusiastic about reading, especially on the book give-away days, when they get to increase their personal home library, courtesy of Scholastic Books. It excites me and gives me hope for our future readers and the power of knowledge made fun! I am so happy to be a part of this great program!

Returning Home, Settling into the Autumn, My Rich Life Overflowing with Abundance!

2010-11-12T10:54:00.000-08:00

It seems like such an eternity since last I wrote. Being away from home traveling, as wonderful as a trip can be,makes for it hard for me to not be home; in my home in Portland and settled into my home in my body. I am settling in now to the growing darkness and rain, the comforting yin feeling of Autumn, my favorite season.
I have been savoring the past weeks dance, with my dance family, to Mary Oliver's Wild Geese again, a perfect poem for the season. It resonates so deeply for me in the depths of my soul.

"You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting--
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things."

I have also been frantically working to meet some deadlines. I am so proud that I got my proposal submitted to RACC for the Portland Building Installation space for 2011 on time. I have the hopes of installing my ongoing piece "Waiting". I continue to work on it and the idea continues to evolve for me as I grow to understand it even more. To date, I have 79 chairs and will be making 29 more to reach my intended goal of 108 chairs. I will also create other pieces to be a part of this site specific, interactive space. I remain hopeful, yet I am determined to not let the acceptance of this piece by the committee, be the determining factor of its inherent worth. I am, afterall, creating it for me. Having the privilege of sharing it with others would be an added benefit and bring in other peoples experiences and energy. Now I continue to wait.................

In addition, I finished the 6 x 6 piece that I have donated for the auction to benefit the Audubon Society's Wild Art's Festival 2010 that will be held the weekend of Nov 20.

Yesterday was a wonderful art play date with my fellow creative spirit Eddy. We scavanged some of Portland's haunts and then made it over to The Community Warehouse, where we chose our pieces that we will transform for this year's Chair Affair.(Did I actually bring home THREE chairs this time??!) I cannot believe another year has past and that it is that time again. (Before, during and after pictures will be posted in the upcoming months). I am excited about the event again, and plan to be a part of the planning of it as well.

Next weekend I will volunteer with Michael at M.O.M., Missions of Mercy.

I will help with the Oregon State Dental Society to provide $1 million worth of free dental care to 1,500 to 2,000 people in just two days!

The following weekend I will once again work with Loaves and Fishes The Meals on Wheels people, Donate a Dinner , to try to raise money to provide meals to home bound seniors during the holidays.

Now begins the wonderful planning stages leading up to my favorite time of the year,Thanksgiving. I have so much to be grateful for as always. I am expecially grateful that this year I will be able to chop and cook in the kitchen along side my favorite culinary student and master chef in the Grishman kitchen, Jenni, since my wrist surgery in February was successful and I have my life back!!

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words!

2010-10-05T12:26:00.000-07:00

Aloha from Kauai, paradise, the most beautiful spiritual place I can imagine and how overjoyed and blessed I am to be spending my birthday here and have a rainbow come out to help me celebrate! Life is good!